Lao She’s "Divorce": The Reality and Absurdity of Marriage#
In Lao She's novel "Divorce," a group of people is depicted; they are junior clerks at the Finance Bureau in Beiping, each harboring regrets, dissatisfaction, and helplessness about their marriages. Despite various issues that create a façade of separation, none ultimately divorce. Brother Zhang is obsessed with matchmaking and preserving marriages, Old Li longs for the escape of a soulmate, and Uncle Ding oscillates between sanity and madness. Life appears mundane and trivial, yet crises lurk everywhere. People wander between the vast chasm of ideals and reality, finding it difficult to escape the myriad challenges life presents, regardless of time or place. When reality shatters, they finally understand: the best form of marriage is not a seamless perfection but a coexistence marked by cracks.
01 Those Who Live for "Perfection" Will Ultimately Be Consumed by It#
Brother Zhang is the elder brother to everyone, a living deity in the Finance Bureau, adept at navigating social intricacies with finesse. His most sacred mission in life is to be a matchmaker and oppose divorce. He is constantly busy, either introducing partners to colleagues or mediating disputes among them, functioning like a microscope and a scale, swiftly identifying "matches" in the crowd.
When those old maids see him, their gray lives gain a hint of rose color. Brother Zhang's standards are uncompromising; he believes that any marriage not sanctioned by him is inferior and will not attend such unions. He values dignity and leads a vibrant life. The book describes him as a walking encyclopedia, knowledgeable about everything in every field. He has held every minor official position. No matter how society changes, he always has work to do.
He is the only character in "Divorce" who does not want a divorce, yet he does not have a harmonious family. He spends his days socializing with friends and working for others. Mrs. Zhang sacrifices her own identity for the family, busying herself around her husband, daughter, and inept son, living as a mere housekeeper. The spiritual gap between the couple is no less than that of Old Li and his wife.
The most terrifying thing in the world is to live as others expect you to. Brother Zhang has built a cage with the word "perfection," trapping himself and his wife and children. He does not realize that marriage is not an exhibit but the mutual acceptance of two real souls.
02 Those Who Pursue "Poetry" Ultimately Lose to "Reality"#
Old Li was born in the countryside and moved to the city to study at the age of fourteen or fifteen. After graduating from university, he became a clerk at the Finance Bureau in Beiping, relying on his exceptional writing skills and knowledge. At work, he silently took on all the hard labor, yet never received a share of the rewards. He remained obscure in the bureaucratic world, unwilling to accept mediocrity.
He enjoys buying and reading books, a romanticist who loves to fantasize, seeking a bit of poetry in mundane life. He eagerly anticipates a romantic marriage, envisioning an ideal partner who is passionate like a poem, joyful like music, and pure like an angel… But the reality is that his wife has bound feet, spends her days chasing chickens and calling pigs, scaring children with her loud voice, and even cursing in the streets.
She comes from the countryside, bringing with her a rustic demeanor that clashes with Old Li's spiritual world. One yearns for artistic expression and soul connection, while the other only understands the trivialities of daily life. Living under the same roof, their hearts feel worlds apart. Old Li has contemplated divorce countless times, yearning for that unattainable "poetic life."
Thus, Old Li tries to transform his wife, gradually leading their marriage to a state of annoyance. He patiently reads to her, while she worries about unfinished household chores and hungry children. He kindly takes her out to see the world, but she shows no interest in delicate items and instead buys a plain scarf.
Sighs and hopelessness turn their marriage into a pile of ashes. The silence of their life makes each day increasingly dreary. Until one day, Old Li encounters Mrs. Ma, the landlord's daughter-in-law, in the yard. She is gentle, cultured, and romantic, having eloped with her husband for love.
Especially upon learning that her husband has strayed and is out gallivanting, leaving her in a state of melancholy, Old Li gradually develops feelings for Mrs. Ma, even hoping she would divorce her husband. But this is ultimately just a daydream for Old Li; Mrs. Ma always sees him as an ordinary neighbor. Later, when Mr. Ma returns home with his mistress, Mrs. Ma sits at the same table with them, showing no resistance, even spending the night in the same room with Mr. Ma.
Old Li's poetic fantasies shatter instantly; he feels Mrs. Ma is no different from those mundane women. Marriage is not a romantic drama filled with flowers and snow but a documentary of daily life. As Yi Shu said: "Love, if it does not show the other person your most beautiful side, is the ugliest side; while marriage shows the other person your most authentic self." Those who constantly seek an "ideal life" elsewhere often overlook the most genuine warmth right in front of them.
03 The "Madman" Who Is Awake Is the True Wise One#
Uncle Ding is honest and was often despised by his wife in his youth. Due to life's misfortunes, he frequently turned to alcohol, causing many humorous incidents. For example, he fell off a vehicle and ended up bruised; he handed his freshly earned salary to a beggar and used official documents as fire paper. Yet he feels that being drunk in a stinking ditch is better than going home, where his wife won't let him hold their son, not even to play with him, and others say, "That's not Ding Er's son."
Later, his wife took their son and left, and Ding Er had nothing to wear. Someone gave him a large shirt, which he sold for alcohol. Penniless, he wandered the streets until Brother Zhang took him in. After entering Zhang's home, he never drank again. He wore Brother Zhang's discarded old clothes, his cotton robe resembling autumn willows, his pants like lotus seed baskets, and his hat like a large mushroom.
He is not a servant, but when Brother Zhang and his wife go out, he watches the house and tends the fire. In Brother Zhang's eyes, he is a useless yet indispensable person. He is always running errands, his legs moving at the command of others, often chatting with birds, naming them like "Flower Monk," "Winged Tiger," and "Leopard Head." He considers himself the timely rain, Song Jiang, and often holds hero meetings in his small room.
His greatest hope in life is to receive a letter from his son, pouring his love and longing for his son into the children around him, who all like him. He is often scolded as a useless person and faces cold stares everywhere, yet he is more conscientious than anyone else, understanding gratitude and reciprocity. When Xiao Zhao plots against the Zhang family, eagerly anticipating marrying Brother Zhang's daughter Xiuzhen, Ding Er does not hesitate to kill him. He does not seek to be a hero; he only wants to protect the Zhang family's property and children.
He remains a good-for-nothing in others' eyes, with only Old Li willing to help him avoid trouble. Eileen Chang once said that life is a beautiful robe filled with lice. Life spares no one; beneath the glamorous robe lies each person's decay and suffering. The truth of marriage often hides in the mad ramblings of the awakened. Uncle Ding seems insane, yet he understands better than anyone: marriage is not possession but tolerance; it is not about taking but about giving.
In Conclusion#
Life is like a mirror; if you smile at it, it smiles back at you. Maintaining an optimistic attitude makes life beautiful everywhere. Years have passed, and the alleys of Beiping in "Divorce" still reflect the absurdity and reality of marriage like a funhouse mirror. The characters in the book are trapped in the dilemma of wanting a divorce but not daring to, reflecting the helplessness of ordinary people habitually ensnared by life.
Lao She, with a humorous yet stern pen, tells us through the ending where no one divorces: marriage has never been a perfect artwork but the mutual completion of two flawed souls. What people seek in life is simply: in this bustling world, to have someone willing to accompany you through life slowly, basking in the winter sun and enjoying the summer shade. Just like the old well in the courtyard, covered in moss, yet always nourishing a piece of land. Those edges worn down by marriage ultimately transform into the soft light of time.